Why “Performance” Is Cheap—And What TRULY Moves an Audience.

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou

Over my 31 years as a casting director in film and television, I directed close to half a million auditions. That number isn’t an exaggeration—it’s the reality of sitting in rooms where actors walk in one after the other, high-stakes aspirations in tow, and hope to land a job using any combination of true imagination, guile or go-to-schtick.

But what I witnessed over decades wasn’t just talent, nerves, or ambition. It was something deeper: a revealing case study in what connects—and what doesn’t. What made me advocate for one actor over another.
So I reverse-engineered it to discover how to teach it.

And the biggest takeaway?

Performance is cheap and short-lived. Presence is priceless and creates lasting impact.

Let me explain:

Performance Is All About the Performer

When actors came in trying to "perform the character", what they were really doing was trying to look convincing—to sell me on their abilities while reciting the scripted part and trying to be believable as an imitation of life. It’s a mental process that doesn’t reflect the authenticity of life circumstances because in life, we’re reacting to our ever-unfolding “now.”

They were acting at me. Trying to get a result by doing the part..

And sometimes, that resulted in something technically acceptable. And maybe even impressive to an audience. But it was always empty of the genuine emotion that truly MOVES an audience because we sense when authenticity occurs.

They weren’t focused on the character’s truth or the story being served. They were thinking about getting the job. So that’s what ultimately came out. And had I cast them, they would have continued to do that during the shoot thinking that’s what worked. But the audience wouldn’t have been truly impacted them.

Presence Is About Surrender

The rarest, most compelling auditions came from those who let go of the need to impress and immersed themselves fully in the imagined reality of the character as their primary concern and left the intent to get a job, outside the door.

Because they weren’t trying to get the job.
They were trying to tell the truth.

These actors weren’t “doing” the character as some kind of imitation. They were being in service to the character, the text, and ultimately, the audience in fully trying to relinquish control over to their imagination, giving it the space to come up with something real. Something genuine and unplanned. And the reverse-engineered formula I discovered is actually based on science. Neurologically, the body doesn’t know the difference between what’s real and imagined. So everything emanating from the imagination fully felt, will be real to the body! So even THEY’RE fooled into the reality of the character as it unfolds and they discover what happens at the same time as the audience! Just like in real life.

They let the moment shape them, rather than trying to shape the moment.

And here’s the paradox:

The less they focused on looking good, the better they came across. I call it simply, “Beingness.”

Eckhart Tolle has this to say about it: ”In beingness, subject and object merge into one.” The ancient sages of India called this ananda, “the bliss of being.”

This Applies Far Beyond Acting

I see the exact same dynamic in public speaking—which is now the most common focus of my performance coaching since more of us have to speak publicly. Something that’s also still the #1 greatest fear of human beings.

So most speakers (understandably) aim to look polished, smart, and skilled. They watch TED talks, rehearse to perfection, and try to “perform” their speech with confidence that will help them look good. Understandable!

But the most memorable speakers? The ones who go beyond merely impressing and create real impact that stays with an audience?
They’re not performing.
They’re experiencing their message as they speak.

They’re rooted not so much in their words, but in their imagined reality-the FEELING of what they’re speaking about. Like the actors who went into “beingness” in my office, they’re present with what’s going on in the moment. Imagining what they’re experiencing again and then using words to convey that experience as a secondary component. And because of that focus on feeling through the imagination, we go on the journey with them. Like the Maya Angelou quote, we help them “feel.”

Presence Creates Connection—Literally

A study from University College London monitored audience members’ heartbeats during a live theatre performance.

During the most emotionally resonant moments on nights when both audience and performers felt it was “a great audience,” audience members’ heartbeats literally synchronized. Scientists call this phenomenon “entrainment.”

When we are fully present—whether on stage, in a hall or in a boardroom—our audience feels it. It creates resonance that bypasses logic and speaks directly to the nervous system of the audience….And Vice Versa!! This is proven in the study of psychoneuroimmunology which is a fancy word for the study of emotions on the body. Had we known about this in Stanislavsky’s time, he most likely would have used it to help his students move from mere performance to the art of recreating genuine life moments as actors. But I’ve seen entire rooms of people with no acting backgrounds go there completely committed to their imagined reality. And the times I saw it happen in the audition room were spellbinding.

When that imagination/body connection happens? It’s amazing to watch. That’s where trust lives. That’s where transformation happens.

Real-World Proof: From Casting Rooms to Conference Rooms

I recently completed a three-month coaching engagement with a group of architects at Olson Kundig’s Seattle, Chicago and New York offices..

None of them were “performing” their pitches.
They were showing up authentically—with the same ease and coherence they bring to casual conversations with colleagues. The same people whether they were being watched by an audience or just having a conversation. Not an easy thing to pull off for most people. But we worked by removing obstacles. Not adding assignments. This is authenticity which inspires true trust. Being impressed? Well, that can happen but usually because someone makes something most people fear, look easy.

And as a result?
Their presentations didn’t just sound better. They felt better. They landed. And this approach also solves all the usual problems speakers encounter without having to assign solutions. It allows the speaker to show up as they are without artifice. And audiences can always smell that.

Because when your communication style is rooted in truth, not tactics, your audience can relax. And trust you. And that process is a lot easier than training speakers to simply “impress.” Once you know the secret.

Final Thought: Let Go to Level Up

Here’s the irony:

The more you try to look good, the more disconnected you become to who you really are. Because just like the majority of those actors I saw performing instead of “being,” their focus is on themselves and they’re vulnerable to what controls them. First question I ask a client when they crash and burn in a training: “On whom did your focus just go?” Answer (without exception): “Myself!”

But the moment you surrender your need to be impressive and focus instead on serving the moment, the message, and the audience, everything changes. And it actually gets easier because you’re shrinking your workload! You’re reducing friction instead of adding fuel to approach the situation. This is the exact opposite of most training strategies which add duties like voice modulation, body language assignments, etc.

Presence is not about performance.
It’s about being and service.
And service is where real power lives in all performance mediums whether it’s dance, athletics, music, public speaking or acting.

Interested in learning how to show up with true presence in your speaking, pitching, or presenting?
Let’s talk.